A sharp prick in the balloon of self-confidence!!! Today was a terrible day indeed! Felt that my failure days of childhood until college re-visited me, to make known that I'm just a fool and no brained in this vast wide world of inntelects. Studies and me have been what it calls the antonym. But, things changed when my husband came into my life. his aura of knowledge and quest for scienctific reasoning could'nt not keep me back to continue living my mindane ordinary life, specifically on the professional side. Wanted to build a competence and subject expertise in the field which he formally mastered, and hence gave it all to understand, grasp and 'passionately' learn geo-informatics. The subject is more than a text prescribed content to me. It is my life's only ticket to re-start my failed educational and work life. Each day inspite of the responsibilities, challenges of time and duties, I steal time to learn for it what it takes to be a professional! I was settling for no less. A professional I wated to be. But today, I have a 'fail' tag in this first try that I made on this re-trench. Felt like the walls of hope coming down, all with the little prick called 'fail' tag next to my name. Was shocked and dismayed! Empty and blank! Why? How? What went wrong? I've never ever felt this worried for an educational performance but now I could only feel the waves of failure pass over this blank soul.
All said, I had a reason to ctake comfort in the global knowledge gained in my field. I sure can say, that I've gained expertise, domain knowledge and technological know-how that few of the practioners of my city , yes my city, (for now, at least),would have possibly learnt. Robert Clive, they say took inspiration from a spider which spun it's web after all the odds of being knocked out in the air. It took 16 failed battles for him to win the 17th one. So will I try, again. I will testify how a fool like me was given a second chance to life. I might be just three steps behind success. So, I will try. Will prepare. More determined than ever.
