Tidbid Thoughts

Life is not about making it big or achieving or building a legacy,.... We are here once, and making our experience here, while we live, worthwhile and good, is all that matters,... Living each moment of the day,... One step at a time,...  Zen quotes "living in past is depression, living in future is anxiety, it is living in present which is called life".  see so much sense in the quote, this day,....

Birth of our Child,....

My first glimpse of him, infant wrapped in white jelly sack held on his leg, hanging upside down,…. “Who is coming to receive the baby”, my gynec calls out for nurses, within the room,…. My love by my side, all my pains of delivering a baby normally, seemed like a just a episode of endurance training,… my love made the entire nine hour experience of labor, tolerable.  First set of contractiona from 3 a.m to 10.00, was more of self-hypnotisms, where my mind instructed me to accept and go through the pain, silently. Great thanks to God, for nature has made labor contractions timely and spaced. The labor was accelerated through I.V, and from 10.30 the time I was shifted to labor ward, the silence was turning into little mourns,… Kept crying out the name of my lord, Jesus Chirst, in my native tongue – while the nurses were busy, trying to get everything up and ready – for C-section and normal. Felt no emotional support, from the nurses, in the ward, for none were available to hold my hand or were my side to support “emotionally” me in the pain,…. Around 11..30 my gynec, came in to check the position of the head, which was first unengaged,…. Things were fine, just that my little mourns were gaining muscle and my need for emotional support preceded any medical assistance,…. A thousand thanks to my gynec, who quite understood this and permitted my husband inside the labor room. The need of a birthing partner cannot be exaggerated!!! From the moment, my love was inside the labor ward, the journey was but a endurance exercise. He kept counting through each contractions as reps of 20,…  From 11.30, until 12.50 or 1.00, the emotional support, stemmed from optimism, guidance to endure and instruction to withstand,…. No blanket statements, no void sympathy, no rudeness, but just the right cocktail of love, support and endurance to sustain the pain,…. From 12. 30 the pain was almost unbearable, but with my love by side, the medical team and God’s Presence (Which I believe was there all through), 12.57, we saw a infant wrapped in white jelly sac held on his leg- hanging upside down,…. It was a episiotomy and while the stitches were on, my little baby, was being cleansed, cut for his umbilical cord, given Vitamin shots and tested for his blood grouping,… my love was quite excited, all wanting to see the new born, but little did  I let him go until 1.30,.... Soon, after, I was wholly medically attended to, he with all excitement, went on to see our baby, share the news to the extended family and do the other needful things,… by 1.30, things were normal, and I had no traces of pain and even exhaust,… was up with energy with the new born in our hands, was shifted to the room to be greeted and received,…. It still has not sunk into me that I’m a mother,…. Feel more like a guardian of my baby, to nourish him, to raise him in Godly statues and to train him worldly wisdom – which I prefer to outsource it to my love, for I’m in need of lots of worldly wisdom myself J

Perception towards life has changed a lot since the birth of my child,…. It’s 10 days now, and I feel a need to be a better me,… Life is but a chaff that wind driveth away, and these defining moments, makes one realize that death can knock anytime and doing best to the world than we live in, is the only way we can make this journey of life worthwhile,…. Giving birth to our son, is one of “the” most blessed things the God has bestowed to us and I feel a little meaning to my existence in world is fulfilled, now…. We’ve started on new journey, look forward for God’s light to show on the path that we are about to stride,… Not just as parents, but as instruments who do God’s work,….